
This topic is definitely not part of my usual workshop menu.
Most of the time, my workshops are all about digital skills, entrepreneurship, and business strategy. The stuff that helps people get ahead online. But this week, I flipped the script and ran a session on emotional intelligence.
Yeah, I know. Not exactly in my usual wheelhouse. But here’s the thing—you can be the best at what you do, but if you can’t communicate, work in a team, or manage emotions in the workplace, none of it matters.
And I see this play out all the time.
The Problem That Keeps Coming Up
I work with a lot of international students—mostly aiming for careers in IT, engineering, and accounting. They’re smart, they’ve got the technical skills, and they’re driven. But there’s a gap.
For many of them, topics like mental health, psychological safety, and emotional intelligence seem like some odd Western concept—something that’s not really relevant to them. That is, until they start working with Western teams.
One day, they get pulled into an HR meeting and told they’re too aggressive, too blunt, or not a team player—and they have no idea what they did wrong.
Yet this is not just an international student problem. I’ve seen Aussie mechanics, engineers, IT techs, therapists, accountants, chefs, and even doctors struggle with the same thing. The issue? No one ever teaches us how to recognise or understand our own emotions or how to read others in a workplace setting.
Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace (And Why It’s a Game Changer)
Let’s break it down. Emotional intelligence (EI) isn’t some fluffy, feel-good nonsense. It’s about understanding yourself and the people around you so you can work better, lead better, and get ahead. And a lot of it is just about being a better, more in-tune human.
It comes down to four key things:
Self-awareness – Knowing what you’re feeling and how it affects your behaviour.
Self-regulation – Managing those emotions instead of letting them control you.
Social awareness – Picking up on how others feel and adjusting accordingly.
Relationship management – Navigating workplace interactions, handling conflict, and being a decent human.
Sounds simple, right? But here’s how a lack of emotional intelligence plays out in real life:
An IT specialist knows how to fix the problem but gets overlooked for promotions because they don’t handle user frustration well.
A manager is great at strategy but loses half their team because they can’t regulate their temper.
A mechanic is the best at repairs but gets fewer repeat customers because their communication style comes off as rude.
No one tells you this when you’re learning your trade. But in the real world, your technical skills only get you so far—your ability to handle people takes you the rest of the way.
How The Workshop Went
I knew I couldn’t just waltz into a room full of young South Asian men and say, “Let’s talk about our feelings.” That wasn’t going to land well.
Instead, I framed it as a career advantage—how to read a room, how to avoid unnecessary workplace drama, and how to respond instead of react in tough situations.
We covered things like:
What triggers frustration at work? Recognizing stress points before they blow up.
How to handle difficult conversations. Navigating feedback, criticism, and office politics.
How to listen properly. Not just hearing words, but actually understanding what’s behind them.
And you know what? They engaged.
At first, there was resistance. Or rather, a misunderstanding.
When I asked them what they felt when they first woke up that morning, the tended to list what they did.
Some of the examples:
I went to have a drink or water and realised I was running late so I had to hurry up so I didn't miss my bus.
I was tired so I had a coffee first before I had a shower because I wanted to be alert when I came into the office.
I read the messages from my family WhatsApp group overnight and then got ready to come to work.
It was all very factual. It was all very correct.
But I didn't ask what they did. I asked how they felt.
I could read the discomfort on their faces.
So I told them how I felt.
My brother has called me to say that he was taking Mum to the hospital.
That made me frustrated because I couldn't be there to comfort my Mum.
That disturbed my sleep so that I felt like I had no energy today which made me more frustrated because I want to be effective and good at what I do.
Knowing that I was frustrated, I sat outside the office before work just looking at the rain in the trees and listening to the birds because it made me feel less frustrated.
They started connecting the dots.
This is where they started to understanding how this wasn’t about being soft—it was about being smart.
Because here’s the reality: Emotional intelligence, in the context of this group, isn’t about talking about feelings. It’s about knowing how to work with people so you don’t sabotage your own career.
Why This Matters More Than Ever
Workplaces are evolving. Remote teams, cross-cultural workplaces, and an increasing focus on collaboration and well-being mean that emotional intelligence is no longer optional—it’s essential.
Companies are actively looking for people who can:
Handle conflict resolution without making it worse.
Accept constructive feedback without shutting down.
Work in diverse teams without miscommunication derailing everything.
So, if you want to future-proof your career, ask yourself:
Are you easy to work with?
Do you know how others perceive you?
Can you handle stress and setbacks without it affecting your work?
If not, it’s probably time to start building a little bit of emotional intelligence into your life like it’s just another technical skill—because, in today’s world, it is.
Now that's over, I promise you that I will take off my tie-dye shirt, remove my crystal necklace, wash out my dreadlocks and get back to my usual topics.
At least for now.